Why natural conversation is the fastest route to English fluency
- Aki Singh
- Oct 4
- 8 min read
"Language is not a set of rules; it's a set of experiences." — George Lakoff
Introduction — rethinking language learning for fluency
Learning English isn’t just about memorising vocabulary or mastering grammar rules; it’s about engaging in meaningful conversations that mirror real-life interactions. Traditional methods often emphasise rote learning. We can all recall our time at school, working through textbooks, reading grammar explanations, and memorising vocabulary lists.
However, research in cognitive linguistics and embodied cognition suggests that language acquisition is most effective when it is grounded in natural, context-rich communication. In this article, I will show you how and why natural conversation is the fastest route to English fluency.
There is an important proviso: students who embark on this path must accept and embrace the psychological aspect of language learning. If people do so as I outline in my article 90% of language learning is psychological, then indeed, natural conversation can be the fastest route to English fluency, far more effective than traditional methods.
Cognitive linguistics — language as a reflection of thought
Cognitive linguistics posits that language is deeply intertwined with our cognitive processes. Scholars such as George Lakoff and Ronald Langacker have demonstrated that our understanding of language is shaped by our experiences and perceptions. For instance, Lakoff’s work, with Mark Johnson, on conceptual metaphors shows how abstract concepts are understood through metaphorical mappings grounded in physical experience.
Lakoff and Johnson’s conceptual metaphor theory suggests that we understand abstract ideas through more concrete experiences. Metaphors are not dead, or merely rhetorical, the things found in Shakespeare, as we once thought. For example, we often conceptualise time as a resource—we “spend time” or “save time”—because it mirrors our experience of managing physical resources. This highlights the importance of context in language learning: metaphors shape how we think and communicate. English, like many languages, is full of such metaphorical mappings.
Some of the most common and interesting conceptual metaphors include:
Argument is war
Mapping: Understanding arguments as battles
Examples: “He attacked my position,” “I defended my point of view,” “She won the argument”
Time is money
Mapping: Time is treated as a valuable resource
Examples: “You’re wasting my time,” “I invested an hour in this task,” “How do you spend your time?”
Life is a journey
Mapping: Life events conceptualised as travelling along a path
Examples: “He’s at a crossroads in life,” “She’s going through a difficult patch,” “We’ve reached a turning point”
Ideas are food
Mapping: Ideas as objects to consume or digest
Examples: “That’s a meaty concept,” “Let me chew over your proposal,” “She digested the information quickly”
Emotions are forces
Mapping: Emotions as physical forces acting on us
Examples: “I was overwhelmed by sadness,” “Anger pushed me to speak up,” “Fear gripped him”
Control is up / lack of control is down
Mapping: High = in control, low = powerless
Examples: “I’m on top of the situation,” “He fell into despair,” “She rose to the challenge”
Ideas are objects
Mapping: Thoughts as tangible things
Examples: “I can’t grasp the concept,” “He packaged the idea clearly,” “She laid out her thoughts”
Love is a journey
Mapping: Romantic relationships as a shared path
Examples: “We’ve hit a rough patch in our relationship,” “They’re moving in the same direction,” “We’ve come a long way together”
The mind is a machine / the brain is a computer
Mapping: Thinking as mechanical or computational processes
Examples: “I need to process that information,” “She’s running on empty,” “He rebooted his thinking”
Life is a game
Mapping: Life as rules, goals, and strategies
Examples: “He played his cards right,” “She’s winning at life,” “That’s a risky move”
These metaphors illustrate how language learning is not just about memorising words—it’s about learning new ways to think and perceive the world. Each instance of metaphor is an opportunity for learners to understand how real world experience forms and shapes abstract meanings.
Armed with this knowledge, students can better learn metaophircal expressions and instances of language. Knowing the grounding and origin of metaphorical language can aid learning and improve memory. Taken together this knowledge becomes a powerful tool. Metaphor is everywhere in language, and reveals how perception and experience shape the language we use, and in turn the way we learn language.
Anytime you encounter an instance of metaphor ask yourself the real-world experience that gave rise to the metaphor. Engineering backwards in this way will help you learn the meaning and origin of metaphors and the contexts they can be used in. This is far more powerful than just trying to remember the words and reproduce them irrespective of context.
Cognitive grammar — language as conceptualisation
Ronald Langacker’s cognitive grammar offers a profound shift from the idea that grammar is a set of arbitrary rules, as we've been accustomed to think since our school days. Instead, he argues that language is inseparable from cognition: how we think and conceptualise the world shapes how we speak.
grammar is meaningful: every construction carries meaning. Even abstract rules, such as tense or aspect, reflect our perception of time, agency, and the structure of events. For example, “I ate” versus “I was eating” conveys completion versus continuity.
lexical items are schemas: words belong to larger conceptual schemas. The verb “run” appears in multiple constructions (“run a race,” “run a business,” “run out of time”), each highlighting a different conceptualisation and thus meaning. Context shapes meaning.
focus on usage and patterns: learners acquire grammar by noticing patterns in real usage, not memorising rules. Exposure in meaningful contexts helps learners internalise structures naturally—perfectly aligned with a conversation-based approach.
cognitive reference points: understanding language relies on mental anchors. Prepositions such as “in,” “on,” or “over” are understood by relating one entity to another in conceptual space.
Understanding that grammar is meaningful opens the doors to a new way of language learning. Learners can be more aware of recurring linguistic structures in podcasts, films, texts, and discussions and this can aid and facilitate learning grammatical constructions through recurrence.
What this means in practice is students should pay close attention to the patterns of words used in expressions or constructions in given contexts, and seek to reproduce those patterns in the same or similar contexts. Over time, your understanding will become intuitive, allowing fluent, natural usage of English.
Usage-based theory — learning through conversational interaction
Michael Tomasello’s usage-based theory challenges the notion of an innate language faculty. The idea that there is one part of the brain responsibile for our language ability and language acquisition. Rather, Tomasello suggests, language emerges through social interaction and cognitive engagement. Learners gradually construct knowledge from patterns observed in real communicative contexts.
What we can learn from Tomasello:
language is socially constructed
Learners acquire words and structures by interacting with others and understanding intentions. Joint attention—sharing focus on a topic or object—is central to learning
we can use discussions of business, philosophy, film, or culture to create social and meaningful contexts
pattern learning and construction
Structures emerge from repeated exposure. Observing repeated phrases helps students internalise syntactic constructions naturally
we can practice exercises rooted in authentic conversations rather than isolated grammar rules
cognitive and intentional processes
understanding meaning requires reading social and pragmatic cues. For example, distinguishing “Could you pass the salt?” from “Pass the salt!” relies on context and intention
we must pay attention to interpretation of tone, pragmatics, and context.
emergent grammar
Grammar develops through interaction. Repeated engagement with topics such as movement, play, interaction, reinforces structures without explicit memorisation
What all this means for learning
Conversation is the key. Language is a living tool, not a set of abstract rules. We often think this becuase most methods and traditions of teaching a language attempted to back engineer teaching a language by categorising a language and then taking it apart and teaching those invidual components: tenses, grammar, vocabulary, etc. However, while doing this can be quite efficient for rote learning needs, and exam-targeted learning, it misses the opportunity to learn a language as a means of communication.
Context matters deeply. Meaning emerges from actions and concepts all interacting through real-life scenarios. Most learners of a foreign language can best relate to this if they have travelled to the country whose langauge they are learning. The moment they start real-world conversations in the language they are learning, language instances: phrases, expressions, mode of speech, magically fuse with scenarios and real-life contexts. Old and novel language instances can become fused in the memory forever. Most learners travelling abroad will testify to this kind of experience.
Learning Polish from a textbook, I often got the use of 'thank you' and 'please' completely wrong in some cases and couldn't figure out why. Then repeated encounters in context really helped me. 'Thank you' in Polish can be used to express 'no' or 'refusal. In a shop if a cashier offers you a bag, in Polish you can simply say 'thank you'. This is understood as a polite way to decline an offer. Likewise, 'please' serves as 'you are welcome'. Say you hold a door open for someone, they say 'thank you', and you 'please'. This means 'you're welcome' in Polish. These things become fused in your memory through embodied linguistic behaviour. This holds true for any language we learn.
Embodied cognition — the body’s role in language learning
Embodied cognition theory posits that cognitive processes are rooted in bodily interactions with the world. Language learning is not just mental—it involves the whole body. Scholars like Zeng and Zhong demonstrate that sensorimotor experience enhances comprehension and retention.
Sensorimotor grounding — learning through shared experience
Zeng (2023) shows that joint attention and shared experiences accelerate language learning.
joint attention: focusing on the same object or concept creates a shared reference frame, helping learners interpret language as intentional communication
embodied experience: gestures, demonstrations, and physical engagement deepen understanding. Interaction with real objects or scenarios reinforces memory
teaching applications: use philosophy texts, films, music, or case studies to create shared attention and embodied engagement. Lessons become immersive, memorable, and effective
Neural representation of language — the role of the body in learning
Zhong (2025) demonstrates that language processing engages motor and sensory brain areas, linking understanding to physical experience.
motor-sensory encoding: hearing or reading words like “grasp” activates motor regions
physical activity enhances acquisition: gesturing, role-playing, and even physical sports like boxing link words to actions, improving fluency and retention
teaching applications: associate vocabulary with gestures, use interactive exercises, and simulate real-life or abstract scenarios physically
Students don’t just memorise — they experience language holistically, integrating cognition, social interaction, and the body for faster, deeper learning. Active participation such as responding, questioning, and critically engaging embeds learning deeply. Coupled with embodied experience, things like emergent grammar become more obvious. Tasks and play that involve movement and physical interaction are the perfect medium for learning grammar through recursion and context. These are all powerful tools that can with practice be utlised in an almost intuitive fashion.
The power of natural conversation
Natural conversation lets learners apply language in context, practising pattern recognition, joint attention, and embodied cognition. By engaging with real topics — philosophy, business, popular culture, real-life tasks and scenarios — students internalise language efficiently while developing critical thinking and cultural awareness, and sensitivity to context and meaning.
In my teaching, students immerse themselves in English from the first moment, rarely feeling stressed. The focus is on nurturing a set of habits and skills that capitalise on the insights mentioned above. In my article The things you need to be doing in conversational English learning, I outline exactly the things students and clients need to do in lessons to leverage and apply the knowldge and insights from above.
Conclusion: embracing a holistic approach to language learning
Natural conversation aligns with cognitive and embodied theories of language acquisition. Engaging in meaningful interactions enhances linguistic skills and fosters a deep understanding of language and culture.
If you want to experience this approach firsthand, consider booking a session to see how natural conversation can accelerate your journey to English fluency.
Selected bibliography
Evans, V. (2019). Cognitive linguistics: A complete guide. Edinburgh University Press.
Lakoff, G., & Johnson, M. (1980). Metaphors we live by. University of Chicago Press.
Langacker, R. W. (1987). Foundations of cognitive grammar: Vol. 1. Theoretical prerequisites. Stanford University Press.
Langacker, R. W. (1991). Foundations of cognitive grammar: Vol. 2. Descriptive application. Stanford University Press.
Lewis, F. (1972). The Polish volcano: A case history of hope. Doubleday.
Tomasello, M. (2003). Constructing a language: A usage-based theory of language acquisition. Harvard University Press.
Tomasello, M. (2009). The cultural origins of human cognition. Harvard University Press.
Zeng, Y. (2023). Joint attention and embodiment in second language acquisition: Revisiting usage-based theories. Journal of Cognitive Linguistics, 35(2), 145–168.
Zhong, H. (2025). Neural representation of sensorimotor grounding in bilingual language processing. Cognitive Neuroscience Review, 12(1), 33–57.